The Way Things (Don't) Work
Today it has been raining heavily, a rain becoming steadily heavier since we moved in on Saturday, and I’m pretty miserable. It wouldn’t be so miserable if the houses here weren’t concrete and damn cold. Or if things actually worked properly. The irony of this downpour of rain is that we have a water shortage. Since we moved in 4 days ago, we haven’t had enough water even to take a bath (I was able to take a semi-bath before the water ran out). Sometimes, we have enough water to cook but not to wash dishes. The water shortage is due to a leak in the kitchen tap, which has been dripping steadily. And the sink is so jancky (a flimsy metal thing that’s supported by only two small fixtures to one wall – the sink’s fallen off its tiny ‘supports’ at least five times already, and that’s with us being careful. We can’t put more than a few cups in there for fear it will collapse, so it makes it difficult to wash vegetables and dishes. Never mind trying to keep something there to save all that dripping water we’re losing.
Then there’s a leak in the toilet, which is probably the main culprit for all our water loss and the resultant other headaches (as if it weren’t enough we don’t get water, the neighbors, who are a bit passive aggressive and resent us having moved in, have even more reason to make adversaries of us, as they totally believe we're using all their water). The toilet problem we figured out today and it looks like we can prevent that leak if we don’t use the flush, but flush instead via buckets. But Mamaji (our landlady) just paid a guy to fix all the flushes in all the units. Same guy who installed the faulty tap to begin with. And now he can’t come by to fix the problems that he’s in part responsible for because 1) it’s raining and he’d just rather not show up, and 2) his wife’s going to have surgery soon and… well, forget that, he’d just rather not show up.
We’ve talked to Mamaji every night since we moved in to fix the problems. After we finally get someone to fix the taps (so far that’s the only thing that will likely be fixed because the water leakage is a big problem), we’ll need to have someone fix the bathroom, because at the moment, it’s just a tap without sink. To have to take bucket showers and there’s nothing stopping the water from spilling right out into the next room.
And we JUST moved because the other place had no kitchen, thus making it a tedious thing to cook food (which is necessity because there aren’t any good restaurants around Sidhpur). Actually Mamaji is a really nice lady. We had a good talk when we first moved in. It’s just that she’s a teacher and very busy. Of that and and of her kind, patient way I think these lousy contractors take advantage. And that’s just the way things are. They move so slowly.
I have been supremely frustrated because I’ve been looking forward to setting up the studio space properly, but the reality is so agonizing – forget productivity when you have to spend all this energy and time just to get your basic needs taken care of.
At this point, I don’t know what I can do about it. Things won’t get fixed before they get fixed, and certainly with only a month and a half left, I won’t move again. Besides, as Tamdin said, “you’ll never find a perfect place in India. If the toilet’s good then the kitchen’s got a problem. If those two are good, you have a problem with your room. The only thing you can do is control your attitude. Make yourself happy, or you won’t be happy in this place.” His experience makes him much more tolerant of this kind of thing.
Perhaps I have still been too fixed on the idea of being really productive in my art. At this point, I just need to not let the frustration swallow me up and to simply see that this experience is just opening up reality for me more and more. I am so amazed and humbled by the reality that what I always thought were basic necessities people often go without.
This is the same reality that was grinning at me the other day when I needed to get gas (the places you rent here come with no stove. You have to procure a cylinder with natural gas and portable stove). I went to the gas company asking about getting one. Give me 2400 rupees (roughly $50), he said, and you’ll get a cylinder, gas, a regulator, a pipe, a stove, and a customer book (which would allow me to get refills via the weekly pickup truck – these cylinders weigh too heavy to lug around). When I asked for a breakdown of the costs, they wouldn’t give it to me and at one point said that I was arguing with them. Alas, how strange people start to behave when they know they’re doing something illegal, and especially if they’re a big company doing something illegal!
Don’t worry, he said, I’m not charging you a cent extra. All I ask is 2400 for everything.
This, when they cannot tell me the exact price of the stove. I had been comparing prices and was hoping to get the stove myself. Besides, as the sign right in their shop said, “customers are not obliged to buy a stove from the company.” As I sat there, the price of the stove fluctuated between 900 and 1100 rupees, and then I finally saw on the box, that it was 669. When I pointed out the sign and the price on the box, they put the final pressure on: Actually, you cannot buy gas from us. So you pay 2400 and you’ll get this. We’re not forcing you to buy gas from us. Shall I make this bill or forget it?
Silly me. I knew there was a way to buy gas on the black market, at any of a number of small shops. But I guess I didn't expect the company to move that way. Anyway, the reality is that I needed gas and didn’t have any other way of getting it. But I was so uncomfortable. I gave him the cash and he gave me a piece of paper with somebody else’s name & address on it. That's the way things work. For me, it actually was relatively easy, as 2400 rupees won’t kill me. But there are still a lot of Tibetans here without the documentation required to get gas, and they certainly don’t have that kind of money (on average, if they can even get a job, they can earn about 1500 a month). Who knows, if they’re cunning enough they can convince one of the shops in Kotwali Bazaar to sell them some black market gas for less than that (though as a rule, you always pay much more), or if you’re lucky, you can get one from a friend who got it from his friend, etc. And it’s not like these folks are illegal, because they’re refugees, and have been accepted to live and go to work and school here (via the Tibetan government’s help and programs). But there’s a lot of ambiguity about their status and they still have to fend for themselves on so many levels. They basically have no rights and have to rely on the grace of the government and the kindness of friends and strangers alike.
This gas thing and the non-workings of my new flat are just small examples of the ways things work and don’t work around here. The imperfection is real. I thought the US had problems! Which it does. And I thought I knew that there were injustices in the 3rd world. But to actually experience it, you realize how deep those inequities go. The world is not a fair place, nor will it be for a helluva long time. I feel like I appreciate the benefits of living in the US much more now, thanks to all the people who constantly struggle for justice. We who struggle for justice may see, more than the progress we’ve made, all the imperfections and problems that are still there. That’s good because it keeps us going. But I have a completely different understanding now of equity and justice. They’re ideals. And thanks to my refugee parents who sacrificed everything for me to experience the benefit of that privileged place that's less than ideal.
Then there’s a leak in the toilet, which is probably the main culprit for all our water loss and the resultant other headaches (as if it weren’t enough we don’t get water, the neighbors, who are a bit passive aggressive and resent us having moved in, have even more reason to make adversaries of us, as they totally believe we're using all their water). The toilet problem we figured out today and it looks like we can prevent that leak if we don’t use the flush, but flush instead via buckets. But Mamaji (our landlady) just paid a guy to fix all the flushes in all the units. Same guy who installed the faulty tap to begin with. And now he can’t come by to fix the problems that he’s in part responsible for because 1) it’s raining and he’d just rather not show up, and 2) his wife’s going to have surgery soon and… well, forget that, he’d just rather not show up.
We’ve talked to Mamaji every night since we moved in to fix the problems. After we finally get someone to fix the taps (so far that’s the only thing that will likely be fixed because the water leakage is a big problem), we’ll need to have someone fix the bathroom, because at the moment, it’s just a tap without sink. To have to take bucket showers and there’s nothing stopping the water from spilling right out into the next room.
And we JUST moved because the other place had no kitchen, thus making it a tedious thing to cook food (which is necessity because there aren’t any good restaurants around Sidhpur). Actually Mamaji is a really nice lady. We had a good talk when we first moved in. It’s just that she’s a teacher and very busy. Of that and and of her kind, patient way I think these lousy contractors take advantage. And that’s just the way things are. They move so slowly.
I have been supremely frustrated because I’ve been looking forward to setting up the studio space properly, but the reality is so agonizing – forget productivity when you have to spend all this energy and time just to get your basic needs taken care of.
At this point, I don’t know what I can do about it. Things won’t get fixed before they get fixed, and certainly with only a month and a half left, I won’t move again. Besides, as Tamdin said, “you’ll never find a perfect place in India. If the toilet’s good then the kitchen’s got a problem. If those two are good, you have a problem with your room. The only thing you can do is control your attitude. Make yourself happy, or you won’t be happy in this place.” His experience makes him much more tolerant of this kind of thing.
Perhaps I have still been too fixed on the idea of being really productive in my art. At this point, I just need to not let the frustration swallow me up and to simply see that this experience is just opening up reality for me more and more. I am so amazed and humbled by the reality that what I always thought were basic necessities people often go without.
This is the same reality that was grinning at me the other day when I needed to get gas (the places you rent here come with no stove. You have to procure a cylinder with natural gas and portable stove). I went to the gas company asking about getting one. Give me 2400 rupees (roughly $50), he said, and you’ll get a cylinder, gas, a regulator, a pipe, a stove, and a customer book (which would allow me to get refills via the weekly pickup truck – these cylinders weigh too heavy to lug around). When I asked for a breakdown of the costs, they wouldn’t give it to me and at one point said that I was arguing with them. Alas, how strange people start to behave when they know they’re doing something illegal, and especially if they’re a big company doing something illegal!
Don’t worry, he said, I’m not charging you a cent extra. All I ask is 2400 for everything.
This, when they cannot tell me the exact price of the stove. I had been comparing prices and was hoping to get the stove myself. Besides, as the sign right in their shop said, “customers are not obliged to buy a stove from the company.” As I sat there, the price of the stove fluctuated between 900 and 1100 rupees, and then I finally saw on the box, that it was 669. When I pointed out the sign and the price on the box, they put the final pressure on: Actually, you cannot buy gas from us. So you pay 2400 and you’ll get this. We’re not forcing you to buy gas from us. Shall I make this bill or forget it?
Silly me. I knew there was a way to buy gas on the black market, at any of a number of small shops. But I guess I didn't expect the company to move that way. Anyway, the reality is that I needed gas and didn’t have any other way of getting it. But I was so uncomfortable. I gave him the cash and he gave me a piece of paper with somebody else’s name & address on it. That's the way things work. For me, it actually was relatively easy, as 2400 rupees won’t kill me. But there are still a lot of Tibetans here without the documentation required to get gas, and they certainly don’t have that kind of money (on average, if they can even get a job, they can earn about 1500 a month). Who knows, if they’re cunning enough they can convince one of the shops in Kotwali Bazaar to sell them some black market gas for less than that (though as a rule, you always pay much more), or if you’re lucky, you can get one from a friend who got it from his friend, etc. And it’s not like these folks are illegal, because they’re refugees, and have been accepted to live and go to work and school here (via the Tibetan government’s help and programs). But there’s a lot of ambiguity about their status and they still have to fend for themselves on so many levels. They basically have no rights and have to rely on the grace of the government and the kindness of friends and strangers alike.
This gas thing and the non-workings of my new flat are just small examples of the ways things work and don’t work around here. The imperfection is real. I thought the US had problems! Which it does. And I thought I knew that there were injustices in the 3rd world. But to actually experience it, you realize how deep those inequities go. The world is not a fair place, nor will it be for a helluva long time. I feel like I appreciate the benefits of living in the US much more now, thanks to all the people who constantly struggle for justice. We who struggle for justice may see, more than the progress we’ve made, all the imperfections and problems that are still there. That’s good because it keeps us going. But I have a completely different understanding now of equity and justice. They’re ideals. And thanks to my refugee parents who sacrificed everything for me to experience the benefit of that privileged place that's less than ideal.
posted by sylviashines at 3:24 AM
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